When Da Brat and Jesseca ‘Judy’ Harris-Dupart answered my questions, one thing came through immediately: they weren’t interested in polishing their story for public consumption. Their new memoir, The Way Love Goes, doesn’t read like a curated highlight reel. It reads like them: unfiltered, conversational, and grounded in lived experience.
And that’s exactly the point.
Why Tell This Story Now?
The timing wasn’t random. It came directly from the people who’ve been following their relationship.
“So many people come up to us saying how much they miss us on TV and want to know more,” they wrote. “So we decided to try to help others through personal experiences… the good, bad and ugly.”
Fans first watched their relationship unfold on Brat Loves Judy, but the book goes further. It fills in the gaps between what was shown and what was lived, offering insight that reality TV couldn’t fully capture.
No Filter, No Script
One of the most striking things about the book is how it sounds. Brat’s Chicago cadence and Judy’s New Orleans influence aren’t toned down. They’re the foundation.
“We were having real conversations and we are not perfect and polished women,” they wrote. “This is who we are and how we talk so this is what you get.”
That choice makes the book feel immediate. Less like a manual, more like a conversation.
And for readers who think they already know their story, they hinted at deeper layers.
“They will be surprised to know that Brat wasn’t honest in the beginning… and Judy moved on.”
Coming Out Changed Everything and Nothing
Da Brat’s decision to live openly has been widely covered, but her reflection here feels more personal.
“Choosing to live in my truth didn’t cost me anything,” she wrote. “If I lost people… they didn’t deserve to be in my life anyway. It lifted a weight that I never knew I had.”
Judy, meanwhile, described what it was like loving someone who wasn’t fully public yet.
“I was gonna live in the closet with her until she was ready,” she wrote. “She overprotected my heart with her love so I knew it was safe.”
Together, they framed love as both timing and faith, something that requires readiness, but also trust in when things align.
The Real Work of a Relationship
If there’s one thing they don’t avoid, it’s conflict.
They were candid about how they handle it: “Judy shuts down… Brat wants to resolve ASAP.”
And sometimes, the disagreements are as small as they are memorable.
“We laugh about a damn weed wacker string,” they wrote. “Brat wanted to keep it when we have landscaping people weekly.”
It’s a reminder that even the strongest relationships are built in everyday moments, not just milestones.
They also shared one rule they had to unlearn: maintaining communication with exes. It’s a boundary that evolved as their relationship deepened.
Love and Business Together
Their partnership extends beyond marriage into business, including ventures tied to Kaleidoscope Hair Products.
Rather than overlap roles, they’ve defined them clearly.
“Judy handles the company business while Brat handles home business,” they wrote. “We focus on where our strengths are.”
For Judy, turning their relationship into something tangible is part of a larger vision.
“It means everything for Brat to understand her value,” she explained. “That’s my strength… making love and legacy profitable.”
Brat added that working alongside her wife brought a new perspective.
“Take risks, be unapologetically yourself, and think before you open your mouth.”
Visibility That Means Something
As one of the most visible Black queer couples in entertainment, their presence resonates beyond their own story.
“We take pride in encouraging, motivating and uplifting anyone,” they wrote. “We both have big hearts… we have to contribute to blessing other people.”
When I asked what healthy representation looks like, their answer was direct.
“Love. It looks like you and your person can conquer anything.”
And for readers who may still be afraid to live openly, they hope the book offers clarity.
“Be yourself. Love unapologetically. You will never make everyone happy… only when you are happy, you can make someone else happy.”
More Than a Love Story
At its core, The Way Love Goes isn’t just about how they found each other. It’s about what it takes to stay, to grow, and to be honest along the way.
Not perfect or pristinely polished, just real.
And that’s exactly why it works.