The Real Housewives of New Jersey are not exactly in paradise on their Jamaican vacation. It’s been a lot of drama from the moment they arrived. Right now the biggest issue is between Jackie Goldschneider and Dolores Catania. Jackie is just not Dolores’ cup of tea. On last week’s episode things came to a head when Jackie said it’s not a loss to not be friends with Dolores.
In addition to their drama, Teresa Giudice and Margaret Josephs are one moment away from a full feud. Teresa’s allegiance to Danielle Staub is not going over well with Margaret. Plus, how you can you forget THAT JAIL BAIT DIG? Undoubtedly the biggest wildcard right now is Jennifer Aydin. She’s planning on roasting the other women. Surely this is going to end in a lot of hurt feelings.
Dolores is BIG MAD about her fight with Jackie. This might be the closest we get to Patterson Dolores. We all need this in my life. Jackie might regret being a dog with a bone this time.
Melissa calls Joe Gorga and says she thinks the courts will make an example out of Joe Giudice. What a tragic situation. Even if you dislike Teresa and Joe, it still sucks what’s happening to their children. Unfortunately, they’ll never be able to have a normal life.
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Dolores tells the women she’s still upset about the fight from the previous night’s dinner. Melissa is in an uncomfortable situation because she’s friends with Jackie. However, she’s rooming with Dolores. Whatever move she makes will be disliked by SOMEONE. It’s not an ENVYable position.
Dolores points out that Jackie won’t be able to handle Jennifer’s roast. True through. She flipped out over an Instagram video quickly mocking her. How would she handle a full on roasting session?
The women are spending the day with dolphins. Surely there won’t be any drama at this event. How can you be sad around cute little dolphins? YOU CAN’T.
It’s so cute watching the dolphins come out of the water to kiss everyone. They’re such gentle creatures. The dolphins even pushed people on the boogie boards. I’m having such FOMO right now. Why am I not in Jamaica?
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To make things even better, the dolphins look like they’re having the time of their lives. Why is Teresa so scared of a dolphin? It’s a dolphin, not a shark. I feel like in a lot of ways, Teresa is very sheltered.
Dolores makes a dig about Jackie actually having fun for a change. She also calls out how they have thick skin and Jackie doesn’t. RUDE, but not necessarily incorrect. Jackie never really looks too happy around the group. Her energy is often cold and standoffish.
Melissa and Jackie are having some much needed hangout time. It’s obvious they’re going to highlight her lack of eating this season. They definitely made it a point to show that she only got a small salad. It’s a little cringe for this to be a storyline.
Jennifer points out to Margaret that Jackie has a weird thing with food. Why would you point that out? You know it’s a struggle for her, so why highlight it? That’s a little gross.
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Dolores confides in Teresa how aggravated she was about Jackie talking about Teresa. It turns into Teresa being upset about what Margaret says about her. Her real issue with her is definitely the issue Margaret has with Danielle. What is Teresa’s weird loyalty to Danielle?
Back in Jersey, Frank Catania meets David Principe for dinner. I suspect are personal conversation about Dolores is coming. Frank asks David where he sees the relationship heading. Um. Awkward.
How weird is it that her ex husband is asking Dolores‘ current boyfriend this? To make it weirder, David says his job is his top love. MERP. I’m with Frank here. I’m not too optimistic about this relationship either.
Almost everyone is wearing something floral. Why is this a thing? I mean, they look good, but its weird. Maybe it’ll bring peace to everyone tonight.
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Jennifer’s drinking tequila which means this roasting session might turn nasty quickly. Good luck with that. Melissa references the dramatic Cabo trip from hell. Danielle caused so much drama on that vacation.
On the subject of Danielle, Teresa reveals Danielle had sex with her ex Marty Caffrey. WHAT A FU***NG mess! They deserve each other at this point.
Margaret doesn’t believe a word Teresa is saying. However, it’s possible it happened. Danielle and Marty are living together. It’s a weird arrangement, but whatever floats their boat.
For the most part, Danielle is a liar. In this situation though, she’s likely being honest. It sounds crazy enough to be true.
Margaret calls Marty to straight up ask if they had sex. Marty totally denies having sex with Danielle. However, only Margaret believes him.
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For some reason this triggers Margaret, and she starts screaming at Teresa. OOF. NOW DANIELLE IS CALLING. Marty must have immediately texted Danielle after the phone call. This is a code red drama crisis.
Danielle phones Teresa to confront her about repeating what she said. Marty snitched on Margaret. She doesn’t want to talk about it in front of the girls. She’s mad at Teresa. Oh well. At last this could be the end of their toxic friendship.
Teresa is mad because Margaret got her in trouble with Danielle by calling Marty. Get over it. She would see it when the episode aired anyway, so calm yourself. Another annoying moment insulting viewer intelligence.
Jennifer is wasted, and she’s ready to do her roast. Please don’t fall down the stairs. She mocks Margaret for saying “by the way” a lot, and it’s GOLD. That was actually spot on.
She makes a hilarious joke about Dolores‘ boyfriend never being around. Awk. That got a little too real. Her roasting of Jackie might be a problem though.
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Jennifer brings up food as her main way to roast Jackie. WHY IS SHE RUNNING WITH THIS SO HARD? Luckily, she took it really well. This prompts Dolores to say maybe she’s been a little too harsh with Jackie. This is a great step forward for the two.
Dolores apologizes for how she acted toward Jackie on the trip and agrees to move forward. FINALLY. I love fights that happen and get intense and then they squash it. There’s no need to carry on about the same thing for an entire season.
Teresa is back home and she calls all of her daughters to her to look at family photos. Audriana has hardly any moments she can remember with her father. That’s so depressing. My heart truly aches for these girls.
It’s a very emotional moment for the family because of the uncertainty around Joe’s status. At this time, they don’t know if he’ll be deported or not. Overall, the mystery of everything is killing them all.
Dolores and Frank meet up, and he tells her what he said to David. Dolores feels like Frank didn’t get a real answer at all. Her entire relationship is bizarre to me. I respect her life, but it’s odd.
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Dolores feels as if David wants to be with her, and she claims to be content. Frank should maybe butt out of the situation. Get out of the way.
Joe’s appeal has been denied. Teresa’s in a total state of shock. This is not the outcome she expected. Joe is likely going to be deported. However, she hasn’t told all of her kids. They’re going to be devastated because of this result.
All in all this is going to be it for Joe. At this point all options have been exhausted. On one hand, I get why her daughters want him home. On the other hand, they are fighting a losing fight. They’re up against a system that doesn’t want her to win.
I don’t know what the future holds for them yet, but the family will never be the same.
TELL US – WILL DOLORES AND DAVID LAST AS A COUPLE? SHOULD JOE HAVE BEEN ABLE TO STAY? ARE YOU ENJOYING THIS SEASON OF THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]