Whether you’re a fan of the Harry Potter movies or the books that started it all, you’ve got to admit that J.K. Rowling’s creation is a work of art. Whether you’re hearing words of wisdom from Professor Dumbledore or Ron’s hilarious one-liners, it’s no wonder you wanted to read or hear every word. Funnily enough, someone turned the first page of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone into a Gen Z text and lines like “Mrs. Dursley…had hella neck” I truly can’t get enough of.
The Harry Potter movies had some of the most memorable, magical quotes such as Dumbledore talking about finding happiness during dark times “if one only remembers to turn on the light.” While lines like this are classic, it makes me wonder how the dialogue would be if the series was transformed for Gen Z readers. Well, no need to imagine as @TheLanguageNerds posted on Facebook what the first page of The Philosopher’s Stone would be like in Gen Z text, and here’s a passage I can’t get enough of:
Mrs. Dursley was a total Karen with zero chill and had hella neck, which came in useful when she was stalking her neighbours and not minding her own.
Calling Mrs. Dursley a “Karen” and having “hella neck” makes me laugh happy tears! I’ve never noticed Aunt Petunia’s neck before (if that really does mean neck), but there’s no denying that Harry’s aunt was one of the absolute worst Harry Potter characters. Subjecting him to live in a cupboard under the stairs and treating him like a servant while doting her on her spoiled son was the absolute cringe. Definitely “Karen” status right there. I just love how brutally honest and slaying the text is that I can totally picture someone describing the first scene just like this in everyday chit-chat.
Reading this Gen Z text of Harry Potter is certainly making me feel old that this is how the kids are talking. Reading a sentence like this in the modern take is definitely making me shake my head:
Tbh [The Dursleys] were the last people you’d think would be sus, because they were all fax no printer.
In case you need an urban dictionary translation, “sus” is suspicious, and “all fax no printer” is when something is undeniably true. Reading this text is like having to re-read Shakespearian text to fully grasp what’s happening. But then again, each generation learns new phrases like how previous generations would learn from millennials what “adulting” is or “ghosting.” Based on the Harry Potter Gen Z text, my generation would need to learn phrases like “lowkey tea” and “girlbossing.”
Gen Z should be happy that they get to experience the joys of the Harry Potter TV show just like previous generations got their taste of magic through the movies and the books. We know so far that the upcoming book-to-screen adaptation will be a “faithful adaptation” of the J.K. Rowling book series and that an opening casting call was held reportedly inclusive to all races, gender identities, and ethnicities. While we don’t know what kind of modern changes could be in effect, 32,000 kids auditioning for the new series should mean a larger representation that’ll resonate well with a wide range of audiences.
If reading a Gen Z text on the first page of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone has taught me anything, it’s that language like “hella neck” has come a long way since the 1990s when the books first came out. With times always changing, I’m curious and excited to see what modern changes the TV adaptation will bring to this generation of audiences. Until the Harry Potter series hits your Max subscription in 2026, you can watch the fan-favorite movies on the streamer and your Peacock subscription.