Welcome back to another week of Below Deck, maties. It turns out, this week is the episode we’ve all been waiting for. That’s right, the one where Captain Lee Rosbach gets mad. Last week’s episode ended with James Hough and Elizabeth Frankini finally getting down and dirty in the hot tub. And this week picks up the following morning, which is a full turnaround day for the next charter.
And would you be surprised to learn that Liz has trouble keeping her fling with James to herself? The stew immediately spills the beans to Ashling Lorger and Rob Phillips. We’re talking the moment she arrives on deck. Like, before poor James is even awake or has had time to put clothes on. So by the time he shows up for work, the rumor mill is already in full swing about his escapades the night before. (Naturally, none of this stops Francesca Rubi from finding reasons to criticize Elizabeth’s work first thing in the morning. This despite claiming she doesn’t want “any animosity” in her department, but alas…)
Since it’s a turnaround day, the crew has plenty of time to prep for the next charter. Part of which involves Captain Lee moving the boat from Falmouth Harbor to Jolly Harbor, two hours away. And of course the first time Elizabeth and James see each other is in the crew mess. In front of literally the entire crew. Some of whom already know they hooked up. The moment is all kinds of awkward, and James goes on the defensive, telling his bestie Rob not to believe ANY rumors he might have heard about anything happening in the hot tub. Because that’ll work to diffuse the gossip…
When Captain Lee sits Eddie Lucas, Rachel Hargrove and Francesca down for the next preference sheet meeting, it quickly becomes apparent that the upcoming charter is full of “boat people.” Which is potentially code for demanding know-it-alls who will spend the whole charter playing a game of one-up with the crew. So that should be fun…But at least this time, the preference sheet doesn’t set Rachel off. This time she stays in her seat and doesn’t walk off the boat. Or, you know, tell the Captain to “go f–k himself.” So that’s progress, I guess?
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That night, James invites Elizabeth up to the sun deck for an informal, post-hookup date, of sorts. Even though they’ve dirtied up the hot tub, James insists he wants to take the budding boat-mance slow. Particularly on account of being cheated on by his last girlfriend. And still, the pair stay up late into the night, camped out on blankets and getting to know each other. They bond over everything from their retired moms and dogs to their favorite music and poetry. Sparks are flying. At the same time, Rob and Eddie are down in their bunk, geeking out over new sailing knots. Remind me which of these relationships is more riveting TV?
The morning of the charter, Izzy Wouters wakes up feeling under the weather. However, she refuses even so much as a vitamin C, insisting in the crew mess that her “mama didn’t raise a little bitch.” Umm, OK Isabelle. I understand not wanting to look weak in front of the crew, but like…chill. And maybe take a couple Emergen-C.
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Meanwhile, Captain Lee is stuck in his cabin without any pants. Which falls to Elizabeth not keeping up with the laundry schedule. It also prompts Ashling to finally (finally!) make a play for some camera time. Confronted by Francesca in the laundry room, she promptly throws her fellow stew straight under the bus. Via confessional, she confesses to being fully on Team Chess, and says she’s done picking up the slack for Elizabeth’s constant follies. Hmm…I always knew there was a catty mean girl under that sunny Australian smile. Welcome to the show, Ash!
Once the guests board, it quickly becomes apparent that this charter will be, ahem, a handful. There’s tiny chaos: Francesca forgetting her third stripes, Rachel freezing her phone while cooking. And also big demands: over lunch, the guests pepper Eddie and Chess with an unending itinerary to plan. They want to jet ski. No, they want to go ashore! No, one wants the slide put out! No, this! No, that! It’s enough to drive anyone, but especially Eddie crazy. And since they’re “boat people,” the group truly does act like they know everything. And want everything. All at the same time.
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After an afternoon of jet-skiing, what the guests want is a Great Gatsby-themed dinner. With Captain Lee in attendance. Because it just wouldn’t be a season of Below Deck with a Roaring ’20s-themed event of some kind. But one thing the Stud of the Sea will not be doing is wearing some silly flapper get-up. (Side note: as of this year, the F. Scott Fitzgerald classic is officially public domain, so brace yourself for way more Gatsby fanfic to be subjected onto the universe.) The guests also happen to be hard partiers and big drinkers. Like, by five p.m. they’ve nearly cleaned Francesca out of her champagne supply for the entire charter.
While Rachel‘s busy inventing a Gatsby-themed menu, gossip about James and Elizabeth‘s hookup is spreading like wildfire through the boat. Mostly thanks to Ashling, who spills the tea to both Rachel and Francesca. However, James can’t be bothered. He’s too busy spotting sperm whales in the water with Rob, who might be his one true love on board. By the end of the day, Izzy‘s feeling even worse. And now she’s starting to worry that her symptoms may be her Guillain-Barré syndrome flaring up. (That’s the rare auto-immune disorder that she revealed once temporarily paralyzed her a few charters ago.)
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Dinner goes relatively well. Captain Lee is begrudgingly in his tuxedo. Rachel‘s sending out waffles made of sweet potato tater tots. The guests are all wearing their best Gatsby cosplay and having a rip roaring time. However, one guest is getting increasingly obnoxious as the night goes on. Let’s call her Delores the jet ski racer. With each passing course, she’s getting more and more inebriated. And even amid the social niceties of dining with charter guests, Captain Lee looks visibly unimpressed. By dessert, Delores has decided she wants to go on deck and be by the water. No wait, she meant in the water.
Before we know it, the very drunk Delores is insisting on jumping in the ocean. At night. In the dark. And despite a stern warning from a very angry Captain Lee, she does just that, diving in white dress and all. The crew is astounded, with Francesca calling James to the swim platform to come rescue her, if needed. The deckhand seems utterly amused by the whole thing. But Captain Lee? Captain Lee is furious. Like, most angry we’ve ever seen him at a charter guest in eight seasons-level furious. And it certainly doesn’t help that Delores remains belligerent, refusing to get out of the water and spouting off the old excuse of “I paid a lot of money, so I can do whatever I want.”
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And just like that, Captain Lee ends the charter. Sorry, folks. It doesn’t matter how much money you pay. You do not jump in the ocean at night, or disrespect Captain Lee. Not ever. The other guests try to make excuses for Delores, but their cries are futile. This charter is ending early and My Seanna is headed back to the dock. You lose, Delores. In the words of another piece of art that name-drops Gatsby, this is why we can’t have nice things.
TELL US – ARE “BOAT PEOPLE” THE WORST KIND OF CHARTER GUESTS? DOES ASHLING HATE ELIZABETH? WILL CAPTAIN LEE REALLY END THE CHARTER EARLY?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]