On last night’s Real Housewives Of Atlanta the tables turned on relationships everywhere and Cynthia Bailey‘s thirst was finally quenched!
Mike Hill is in town, and when Mike is in town Cynthia is anything but #CHill, ironically. Trying to prepare us for greatness and a truly epic moment, the editors provide a black and white montage (like the dark ages before TV was truly fiction) of Mike preparing to propose. Including asking Cynthia’s mom and sister for permission. Unlike last time when they were – wisely! – hiding the marriage license hours before the ceremony, this time they are overjoyed!
Things turn technicolor when Mike brings Noelle, along with his own two daughters, to the jewelry store to pick up the ring.
Luckily, Cynthia is too distracted to notice all the preparations. Cynthia is busy trying to get to the bottom of what she’s now calling “Snakegate.” Amateur sleuth Cynthia is trying to determine which ‘snake’ of a so-called friend secretly recorded her and sent it to Nene Leakes. Considering there’s a suspect pool of two, this shouldn’t be that hard. But, Cynthia is also preoccupied by the opening of the Bailey Wine Cellar – whatever that is. So is Cynthia selling wine because she is always parched?
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Cynthia invites Marlo Hampton for lunch and Marlo arrives wearing a whole lotta boob. I’m not sure what is going on with her looks lately, but someone introduce this woman to Third Love for a supportive bra! Marlo doesn’t want to eat anything, which seems to indicate that she’s preparing to go ham. However, when Cynthia confronts her about the recording Marlo instantly seems hurt, and actually tears up. Over-acting?
Marlo is horrified that Cynthia would ever accuse her of betrayal, especially when Cynthia’s own friendship with Kenya Moore betrays their friendship! Marlo likens this to her relationship with NeNe: just because Marlo and NeNe are besties, doesn’t mean there isn’t a place in her heart, just below her ample cleavage, for Cynthia too. Marlo is rewarded with an invite to the Bailey Wine Cellar, but NeNe is still not making that guest list.
I wonder if NeNe is getting a cut of all Marlo’s royalties? This is another episode where NeNe didn’t appear, yet Marlo and Yovanna Momplaisir were there to be her mouthpiece and make sure she stayed a topic!
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And now over to Porsha Williams‘ house where she and PJ hired a chef to make a tiny cake for Dennis McKinley‘s birthday. Porsha is all decked out in a low-cut outfit which matches Pilar’s romper, but she insists her cookie jar is firmly closed until Dennis proves that the buttermilk is clean. Dennis can make all the upgrading of her engagement ring he wants, but she’ll only put it back on when the proof is in the pudding. And, seriously, snapback or not Porsha would much rather eat pudding!
Good for her — although I don’t think she waited long enough for the trust to be rebuilt. I’m also disappointed by friends like Marlo insisting that Porsha should just overlook Dennis‘ infidelity as a glitch and take him back. NO!
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Meanwhile, Kandi Burruss meets Todd Tucker at yet another of his would-be businesses. Todd is running Attention Deficit Disorder Investments, or something, because he’s started 3 restaurant ventures, yet hasn’t completed one and is spending Kandi’s money on leases. The latest plan is Olé G Tacos and Tequila. It’s going to take a couple hundred thousand to renovate the space, which has been sitting half completed for months while Todd also rents other properties. It seems like Todd has been hanging out with Peter Thomas and taking business advice from him too!
Kandi is understandably annoyed because messing with her money is where she draws the line. Kandi points out that she has survived a recession, finances intact, and with another one on the horizon she doesn’t want to be over-extended. It sounds like Kandi needs to diversify by setting Todd up with a tight allowance, called the Peachter Peachter Bank Account Eater Fund, and then keep everything else on lockdown in Mama Joyce‘s vault.
Then it’s time to pop bottles and questions! During Cynthia’s wine opening, Mike whispers to Kandi to stick around for a special announcement. Seeing that Kenya is running late Kandi texts her to hurry up because she thinks Mike may propose. Either Mike warned all these women to keep it together, or they all sensed the love in the air, or they all respect Cynthia that much because EVERYONE was on their very best behavior. All the squabbles – even the ones between Marlo and Kenya or Eva Marcille and Marlo (and Kenya) were squashed.
Marlo arrives bearing gifts: large platters of cheese and crackers, prepared lovingly by Publix, and a card from NeNe reminding Cynthia that she has always been a supportive friend and Cynthia better recognize. The card seemed on its surface, sweet, but underneath there was still the NeNe-ness of it all. Cynthia tears up and feels sad that her long-time friend is missing this. Porsha’s love will not be bought by olive tapenade, and she’s not impressed. We know NeNe’s life coach wrote that card anyway!
When Kenya arrives, she almost immediately tells Cynthia she has a feeling Mike will be proposing tonight. Kandi is furious that Kenya is ruining the surprise! Kandi pulls Kenya aside and lectures her for running her mouth and being messy. Shockingly, Kenya didn’t get in Kandi’s face, but she wasn’t contrite either. What was Kenya thinking?! Finally, Kandi is getting an example of what everyone has seen with Krayonce for years. She’s the snake in the grass… and, hopefully, she doesn’t have her iPhone set to record!
Kenya also doesn’t buy the sincerity of NeNe’s card. So, I agree with her calling that out at least!
Of course, Mike does propose, just after Cynthia officiates her opening. Even though Cynthia knew it was coming she was still shocked, and it was all very sweet. Especially the way Mike involved all their daughters. Literally everyone seemed overjoyed which is super nice, and no one was scene-stealing or obnoxious. Not even Yovanna who was strangely there.
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The problem with Kenya is that Marc Daly is also in town. The next day, Cynthia and Mike, along with Kandi and Todd meet Kenya and Marc for dinner to celebrate the engagement.
Kenya and Marc are such a fiasco that I was uncomfortable watching through the TV! The issues started when Marc was harassing Kenya about her car (maybe a Tesla?) warning her that she wasn’t being safe, and mocking her for having something so flashy. Kenya keeps trying to bite her tongue to avoid making waves, which I don’t like. For all the years I’ve found Krayonce’s gone with the wind messiness annoying as all hell, I also don’t like Kenya seeming scared to be herself.
Over dinner the tensions increase and Marc and Kenya’s testiness ruin the meal for everyone else. Across the table, they throw constant digs, insinuations, and jabs, then finally outright insults. Even the husbands are uncomfortable, but Kandi and Cynthia are shocked.
We learn that Marc didn’t actually propose, he just bought a ring, thrust it at Kenya and announced “We’re official now.” She planned the wedding and he kept her on a tight budget. For however unromantic his proposal was, Marc insists he was very romantic at their wedding. The one where Kenya’s family members weren’t even invited – not even her father whom she loves, or her Aunt Lori and cousin Shay.
Kenya calls the wedding the happiest day of her life, tied only with the day she won Miss USA. Kandi can’ believe that winning a pageant was more important than the day Kenya had Brooklyn, and once again is confused about Kenya’s priorities. I agree – that is weird. For all Kenya’s years bemoaning how she wanted to be a mother, Brooklyn isn’t the top 2 best memories of her life? Marrying Marc should be down there with worst memories, actually.
Marc and Kenya do not have prenup. Something he insisted on. He also insists that he’s not after Kenya’s money, yet he is spending it nonstop by telling her what she’s allowed to buy (not a flashy car) and deciding it should be invested in the house. The one she has paid off. When Kandi wonders how Marc’s business could suffer if they divorce, Marc claims that if Kenya takes everything he built, he’ll build it again. Why on earth would Kenya leave herself so legally vulnerable?! Let’s just hope she’s able to convincingly prove in court that this marriage was a showmance, otherwise she’s screwed!
And the final nail in the coffin: Marc defends NeNe! According to him NeNe was nice to him from the very first moment and showed the ultimate sign of respect by immediately introducing him to Gregg. The same man NeNe was threatening to divorce and complained about getting cancer to ruin her life. But to Marc, not being forced to speak to a woman is the number one sign of class and dignity.
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Kenya is horrified. She reminds Marc that when she was pregnant NeNe made fun of her and Marc was upset, but he brushes this aside as being insignificant because NeNe has been nothing but polite and kind to him. Mike agrees he’s never had an issue with NeNe, but the way she treats Cynthia and seeing how much Cynthia is hurt, makes him not want to be around NeNe. Because duh – they’re a team!!
Kandi and Cynthia have no idea how to react to Marc being such an ass, but Kenya just orders him another drink – since they have a self-driving car and all – then makes a very awkward and jab-laden toast about how couples should be ride or die, and not just the women but the men too. Does Kenya mean she will ride over Marc, then blame the self-driving Bentley?
Marc is SUCH AN ASS! He seems dangerous, too. I do not trust that guy and I do not understand why Kenya, a self-described “alpha female,” is attracted to all these controlling misogynists?! I cannot believe she stayed at that dinner and did not leave with the way he was picking fights in front of her friends and insulting her! The animosity between these two is worse than two Real Housewives trapped on a vacation together. Speaking of… next week the women all meet up in Toronto and things get physical between NeNe and Kenya!
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TELL US – WHAT IS GOING ON WITH KENYA AND MARC? SHOULD CYNTHIA FORGIVE NENE AFTER THAT CARD? WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE LACK OF NENE THIS SEASON ON REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ATLANTA?
[Photo Credits: Bravo]